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Friday, January 29, 2010

The Hand that Rocks the Cradle...

THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE...


Is consumed with caring for her sweet boy, husband, and home. She can't do it without wisdom, strength, and encouragement from the Father! She is desperate for Him.

Couldn't have imagined the challenges and joys she has experienced in just a couple short months. She doesn't have much time to sit back and reflect, but when she does, she is overwhelmed with gratitude for God's faithfulness.

Is grateful for a loving and supportive husband who makes it possible for her to be the one who comforts her sweet babe all day long. She thanks God that he gave her a man that has a passion for family!

Knows she is extremely blessed to have a husband who is constantly encouraging her spiritually, emotionally, and physically as she cares for his child. She knows it is a gift to have a husband who will help her in the wee hours of the night and still wake up in the morning with a smile on his face.

Is taken back by friends and family who have graciously served her through infections, sleepless nights, and postpartum emotions. She cries as she realizes that her mother still desires to love and care for her just like she cares for her new baby.

Doesn't know how to put into words how "motherhood" has rocked her world! It requires constant prayer. It requires her to lay down more and more of herself. It has brought her weaknesses into the light and has left her begging for a passion to serve. It has brought her so much joy. It is PRICELESS!

Watches her sweet boy as he grows and changes each and every day! She can't believe how quickly he is changing. She knows that right now he is a crying baby full of demands, but she asks God for the strength to enjoy each moment because she also knows he won't be like this for long.
Doesn't have much time to write on this blog because these guys keep her pretty busy :)!


Blessings on the hand of women! Angels guard its strength and grace, In the palace, cottage, hovel, Oh, no matter where the place; Would that never storms assailed it, Rainbows ever gently curled; For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world. Infancy's the tender fountain, Power may with beauty flow, Mother's first to guide the streamlets, From them souls unresting grow— Grow on for the good or evil, Sunshine streamed or evil hurled; For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world. Woman, how divine your mission Here upon our natal sod! Keep, oh, keep the young heart open Always to the breath of God! All true trophies of the ages Are from mother-love impearled; For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world. Blessings on the hand of women! Fathers, sons, and daughters cry, And the sacred song is mingled With the worship in the sky— Mingles where no tempest darkens, Rainbows evermore are hurled; For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world.

By William Ross Wallace

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Our Perfect Christmas Gift


*This is the birth story of Judah Benjamin. I decided to write this story not only so that I could share it with family and friends, but also so that I would have a detailed account of this amazing day! It is long, but if you are interested, grab a cup of coffee and enjoy!

Judah Benjamin arrived at 12:24pm on Christmas Day after over 9 hours of labor. He weighed 6.9 lbs and was 18 inches long. He was the PERFECT Christmas gift from God. This is a Christmas we will never forget. Here is how it all happened...

Christmas Eve looked like a normal night for us. We joined my in-laws for some soup and then came home to play a quick game of Payday. I had a short period of braxton-hicks contractions (I had them nightly for almost two weeks prior to his arrival), but we went to bed as usual assuming that this was not the night (we joked about him being a Christmas baby but we didn't really think he would come on Christmas).

I woke up at 2:00am with obvious contractions. Again, this didn't alarm me right away because I'd woken up with braxton-hicks many nights. I got up and tried to sway from side to side to make them go away. Then, I tried to lay back down like I had done many nights before. As soon as I laid down, the contractions seemed to intensify. It was at this moment that I knew I could be in labor. I let Nathan know that I was having some intense contractions, but I told him to stay in bed because I knew that if I was in labor, he was going to need the rest. I went into our living room and tried several different positions to ease the contractions, but nothing seemed to work. I decided I should try to time the contractions. Funny thing was that despite all of our birth preparations, I couldn't seem to find a watch with a second hand, so I had to wake Nathan to help me search for a watch with a second hand. Thankfully, we found an old watch tucked away in a drawer. I told Nathan to lay back down and I went in the living room to try to distract myself by watching some tv as I timed contractions. After about 30 minutes of timing the contractions, I realized that they were 6-7 minutes apart and lasted about a minute. At this point, I was pretty sure that I was in labor, so I woke Nathan to let him know. He got up and took over timing the contractions. After timing the contractions for another 30 minutes, we confirmed that I was indeed in labor. My contractions were consistently 6-7 minutes apart and were intensifying despite my walking, swaying, and changing positions.

It was around 3:30am when we decided to call our doula to seek her advice. After talking with us and listening to my breathing through a contraction, she suggested I get in the bath. I had planned on using the tub during early labor so I was excited to get in the warm water. My tub time was the absolute sweetest time. I listened to worship music, prayed, meditated on the word, laughed with Nathan, and shed many tears of joy. Nathan and I even exchanged Christmas gifts in between contractions. We laughed as we ripped through the wrapping paper, knowing that we only had 5 minutes until another painful contraction. After over two hours in the tub (and lots of hot water refills) and over an hour of consistent 1 minute contractions 4-5 minutes apart, Nathan told me that I had to get out of the tub. Needless to say, I did not want to get out of the tub. The contractions were of course painful, but I was enjoying the tub time so much that I didn't want it to end. I wept as Nathan helped me out of the tub. My tears were a mixture of excitement and a grieving of my time at home ending.

As soon as I got out of the tub the contractions seemed to intensify and I felt very lightheaded. After a few minutes and some motivational speaking from my dear husband, I finally got dressed and we were on our way to the hospital. When we arrived at the hospital around 6:30am, a nurse showed us to our room. I tried to make a little joke with the nurse about working on Christmas, but she was not in the mood. I prayed that she would have a more tender heart towards me even though it was indeed Christmas. My friends and I had been praying that I would have a nurse that was not only tolerant but supportive of natural birth. After my short interaction with this nurse, I was a little concerned that this was not going to be the case. That was until the nurse entered the room and let us know that another nurse would be taking over for the day shift. The other nurse walked in with the biggest smile on her face. She looked at Nathan and I and said, "Isn't it so special to be having a Christmas baby". She then said that she had both of her children naturally, so it was definitely possible to give birth naturally. I looked at Nathan with a smile on my face and thanked God for his faithfulness. He gave us the absolute BEST nursing staff, which made all the difference.

My awesome doula arrived shortly after our arrival. Despite it being Christmas morning, she came ready to joyfully and humbly serve me (she is truly heaven sent). She put both Nathan and I at ease as she discussed the progression of my labor and comfort positions. The nurse checked me and discovered I was 4.5 cm's and 90% effaced (I was almost 4 cm's and 80% effaced on Monday). My contractions were coming quicker and intensifying, so I knew my labor was progressing. At this point, I was still in the mood for small talk and seemed to be managing my contractions with rhythmic breathing. My doula had me try a couple different positions to keep my labor progressing. Eventually, I got on the birthing ball, which seemed to really get things going.

At around 9:00 am, I got up to use the restroom and my water broke. This was another answer to prayer! I had prayed that my water would break naturally so that I wouldn't have to decide whether to have the nurse break my water. Once my water broke, the nurse checked me and discovered I was at 6 cm's. Almost immediately, my contractions became VERY INTENSE. The intensity really caught me off guard. My rhythmic breathing techniques were no longer working. The contractions were coming quick and lasting longer. I was in the heat of labor and it was TOUGH (this is not a strong enough word). My doula informed me that this was probably the last opportunity to get an epidural. She let me know that it was completely my choice and supported me either way. I looked at Nathan and my sister-in-law with tears in my eyes and said, "It is really hard." They both looked at me and reassured me that it was my choice and they supported me in my decision. Some of me really wanted to the epidural, but I just wasn't ready to let go of my natural birth experience. My doula could sense this and told me that we would try another position and then I could make a decision. Thankfully, my labor progressed so quickly that I couldn't even think of asking for an epidural. I was in the heat of labor and all of my energy was focused on survival (that's right, I said survival).

One hour after my water broke, the nurse checked me and discovered I was at 9 cm's. I had went from a 6 to a 9 in an hour! AMAZING! At this point, I was in complete surrender and desperation mode. I could do NOTHING except call on the name of Jesus! I can honestly say that anger was not an emotion I experienced, only desperation. I was desperate for comfort from the Father! I was desperate for my baby to come out so that I could look at his precious face! The next two hours were the most painful hours of my life (I am not exaggerating), but as I look back on this time, it was also such a special time for those of us in the room. My husband held me tightly and prayed that God would give me strength. My doula called on the name of Jesus and assured me that God was in the room. My sister-in-law humbly served and encouraged me. I begged God in a way that I have never begged him before! We were all SO desperate for God's power! We all knew he was the only one who could comfort me.

After finding out I was at a 9, the nurses started insisting that Judah was face down (OP). We are not sure if he was truly OP, but one thing was for sure, he was stuck. I was already feeling like I wanted to push at this point, but the nurses told me that I couldn't push until I was at a 10. This was NOT what I wanted to hear. Finally after a few short minutes, a nurse technician with a lot of experience in natural birth walked in the room determined to help me get Judah out! Her country voice demanded that I must get on my hands and knees and rock back and forth in order to get this baby out. My first response was, "I can't", but I could tell she meant business and before I knew it, I was on my hands and knees trying to push Judah out. It was completely exhausting and while God didn't take away my pain, he certainly gave me the strength to continue because I know that at this point, my flesh had nothing left. After pushing for 2 hours, our sweet Judah Benjamin came into this world. They placed his small body on my chest and I felt IMMEDIATE RELIEF! As if in an automatic response, my hands fell to my sides in an upward position as I praised God for this precious gift! All I could say was "thank you God, thank you God!"

On Christmas Day of 2009, I found out what sacrifice truly means! I discovered what it means to be truly desperate for God. I experienced a sweetness with my husband that I have never felt before. I now look at him with a deeper level of respect and love. I also experienced what I've heard so many talk about, the immediate love of a mother for her child.

Now at home, I am learning that I am truly weak! Apart from God, I can't do this motherhood thing, but thankfully God is faithful! Our love for His precious gift is unmeasurable! Please continue to pray!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Goodbye Graduate School


On Friday, a chapter of my life officially ended. After 7 years of higher education, I said goodbye to formal education! Throughout the last year, there have been many times when I didn't want to complete this lengthy master's degree (especially once I realized my passion for the home), but with Nathan and my family's encouragement, I pressed on. Thankfully, I was able to complete all of my requirements (not only course work, but also over 900 hours of internship/clinicals, which by God's grace I was able to do in the perfect setting- Lincoln Village Ministry) just in time. With only 3 (or so) weeks until precious Judah's birth (proof that God's timing is so much greater than mine), I walked across the stage to receive my diploma. While I do not have any immediate plans to "use" this degree, I feel at complete peace knowing that my calling to be a wife and mother is so much greater than any of my previous career dreams.


When I started my master's degree, I promised my mom that I would participate in the graduation ceremony regardless of what season of life I was in when I graduated. I had no idea that this meant I would be sitting through a 3 hour ceremony at 37 weeks pregnant, but never-the-less I kept my promise :). I can't thank my mom enough for the many ways that she supported me throughout these 7 years of higher education! I know she was extremely excited that I finished!


I cannot end this chapter without expressing my extreme gratitude for all of the support that Nathan has given me to complete this program despite our decision for me to become a stay-at-home mom. He has never once complained of the time and money that it has cost us. Instead, he faithfully encouraged me to finish what I started and also reassured me of the value of being his wife and the future mother of his children. THANK YOU JESUS!


Goodbye graduate school, hello motherhood!

Monday, December 7, 2009

A Continual Dripping of Rain or A Crown


BUT

"A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband.." Proverbs 12:4

A study of Proverbs reveals several verses regarding the extreme difficulty and harmfulness of living with a quarrelsome and nagging wife. Initially, we may read these verses and think, "I am not a quarrelsome wife", but a closer look probably reveals moments, days, and maybe even weeks when quarreling attacked our homes. Thankfully, God also tells us of the value of the virtuous woman to her Husband and then gives us further instruction on how to be a "virtuous" woman.

Check out this great post on being a crown to your husband.

I pray that God will show me His ways and give me the strength to be a virtuous woman, instead of nagging wife.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Pregnancy Update: Judah's Nursery (35 Weeks)

Introducing Judah's "vintage" nursery...

35 Weeks
I already love to rock him. This is quickly becoming one of my favorite seats in the house. It is such a gift to be able to sit quietly and feel him move! His little clothes are so sweet.There are lots of thrift store, DIY items, and precious gifts in Judah's room. I love to tell everyone how his room came together because I decided in the beginning that I wasn't going to spend a lot of time and money decorating his nursery. Family and friends helped me with several DIY projects (sewing crib bedding, painting old furniture, etc.) that not only saved us money, but also attached special memories to his room. I also received so many precious gifts (many of which were homemade) from family and friends. Plus, family and friends lent/gave us several different items (a crib, glider, dresser, clothing, toys, etc).
We are so thankful for such giving family and friends!
With the recent onset of braxton hicks contractions, it feels like Judah could arrive at any time. We are so excited to hold our precious baby boy!!! I know that these next 5 (or so) weeks will not be free of aches, pains, and emotion, but I continue to pray that God will fuel my passion for the ministry of motherhood! I know He is doing a great work in me (there is lots of work to be done) as He continues to form Judah in my womb. He is faithful, He is faithful, He is faithful!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Pregnancy (30-32 Weeks) and Other Updates

32 Weeks

30 Weeks (keep reading and my attire will make sense)

3rd Trimester Changes
Back Pain
Well, up until now I've had a pretty smooth pregnancy but for the past week and a half, I have been struggling with some pretty intense back pack. I went on a hike with the Linc children last Wednesday afternoon that was supposed to be 30 minutes, but turned into an hour hike uphill. Needless to say, it must have been too much for my body because I woke up Wednesday night in excruciating pain. I thought it was pain caused from an old stress fracture, but by Friday it had moved to the right side of my back. After almost 3 sleepless nights, I finally called the Dr. and they said it sounded like my Sciatic nerve had become inflamed which causes both constant sharp pain and these horrible sharp shooting pains as the baby moves on the nerve. When the sharp shooting pains would come, they would literally send me to my knees. I had some rough days and nights to say the least. I went and saw a massage therapist and have been taking it VERY easy this week and thankfully it appears to be healing. I am still trying to take it easy and limit the amount of time I am sitting, but my back feels like it is healing. My pregnancy has been so easy thus far, so I was a little taken back by this pain, but I have tried to stay positive (knowing that it could truly be so much worse) and continue to pray that my back will be completely healed :).

A Full Belly
Now that I am in my third trimester, I have learned that overeating (even in the least bit) will result in stomach cramps and difficulty breathing. I have found that eating small frequent meals is the best way to prevent both heartburn and stomach discomfort. Within the last few weeks, I have felt like there isn't much room for food in my big belly.

Lots of Motion
Another fun new change is Judah's big movements and kicks. His movements, jabs, and kicks used to feel like little flutters in my belly, but now I feel sharp distinct kicks and I see him moving all over in my belly! It is incredible! Nate and I love feeling him move and trying to guess which body part we feel or see :). We are so thankful he is healthy and active!

Preparation for Birth
While I have in essence been preparing for labor and delivery for months, I have recently been spending more time trying to mentally and physically prepare myself for birth. This past week, we decided to hire a doula and will begin classes with her in the next couple of weeks. For now, I am reading a lot of good materials and praying about overcoming my fears associated with giving birth (I have a few ;).

While I have certainly experienced some new challenges this trimester, I am still really enjoying carrying this sweet baby! Only 7 (or so) weeks to go!

In other news...

A couple weeks ago, we had a costume party to celebrate Nathan's 30th birthday (It is hard to believe that Nate is 30! Time flies when your having fun.)! A couple of white table covers and some cheap leaves were the key to our perfect costume! We are suckers for a costume party. So far, we've celebrated Christmas and two 30th birthday parties in silly attire. There is something fun about adding a silly dress code to a get together with friends. We had a great time!

This past weekend, we took several of the children to a family fun day hosted by our dear friend's church. They had lots of fun games and activities for both the children and adults. As always, we all really enjoy spending time with this awesome group of people!




Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Prayer


God is continuously showing me that all he wants is for me to come and fall at his feet in prayer.
I am His daughter, He is my father. He promises that if I draw near to Him, He will draw near to me. How desperately I need Him! I am thankful that He has shown me that there is nothing sweeter than being in His presence, fully depending on Him. I am thankful He sent his Son so that I could be in this place with Him. I am learning to sit at His feet in the good times and the tough times. My mistakes want to keep me from His feet, but he won't let me forget that He came for me, a sinner. His grace continues to overwhelm me. His Spirit lives inside me! I bring Him many praises and requests. Even when I don't know what to say, the Spirit intercedes for me. He always answers, but He doesn't always give me the answers I am wanting, when I am wanting them. Waiting on Him is tough, but when He answers, He blows me away. I asked Him to allow me to truly love Him and know His love. He is answering! My need for Him is great, each and every day!

The story of Hannah in 1 Samuel is a wonderful depiction of God's desire for us to come to him in prayer. I encourage you all to read it this week! There is so much to be said of this account, but what caught me was that, "10She, greatly distressed, prayed to the LORD and wept bitterly." She was greatly distressed and instead of running to her husband or friends for comfort and answers, she cried out the Lord and asked him to have mercy on her. There are lots of examples throughout the Word that show us God's great desire for conversation with and dependence on him (including Jesus Himself).

As I seek His Word, he teaches me.

"Therefore, brethren, since we have confidence to enter the holy place by the blood of Jesus,by a new and living way which He inaugurated for us through the veil, that is, His flesh,and since we have a great priest over the house of God,let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider howto stimulate one another to love and good deeds not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near."

Hebrews 10:19-25